Showing up to do the hard work.

The other day, I wrote a post about wanting to be there, not here. Wanting to be writing the book already, doing. Not healing and learning.

Wanting the big milestones, and not the small, but meaningful ones that are part of mental health recovery. 

Then I felt bad for my impatience. 

When I spoke with my therapist about this, she told me that it is actually normal to feel this way. That wanting to make it to the end, especially when I have been struggling with mental health for such a long time, is normal and human. That I don't need to judge myself for these emotions. That I am still showing up to do the hard work. 

Showing to therapy is doing the work she said. 

Having honest conversations, with her, is doing the work. 

I realized that day, after therapy, that if I wasn't doing this work, I would have gone insane already.

Validation and compassion towards my emotions & feelings are crucial in my healing. I am able to calm myself, which helps me regulate and feel safe. 

Paty ♥